Good Bye to Pokeberry Hill...


Friday, February 13, 2009

Carolina Wren Singing..

There is just not a prettier thing than Carolina Wren Song. I'm almost certain they must have these little guys in Heaven. I first heard one when we lived in the house we rented just before this one in another neighborhood of Charlotte. He came in fall with his mate, but over winter I saw only him. I put a dish of suet by the back door for him, on the ground, with a few seeds in it. He is more of a bug eater than a seed eater but he would come and sort of 'hunt' the suet. He would sneak up on it slowly and then pounce on the little seeds in it as if he needed to kill them like a small caterpillar or something. He claimed the yard and in spring he went all around it setting up different spots at corners where he would sing in the early morning.

Here there have been several little C. Wrens, none are my favorite like that one--but I like them all. I often see them popping into my potted plants which I believe they are keeping free of pests for me. Sometimes in the mornings I hear one sing. I stop whatever I've been doing and just listen. C. Wrens are not spectacular looking, they looks sort of like a reddish sparrow except that their little tails stick up wren style. They are biggish for wrens. They are a must have for the garden!

Well yesterday the kids went and finished insulating the downstairs. All that is left is some stapling in one room and to do the ceilings. Wonderful! Now we really must make a decision and purchase our heat/cool system. There are still quite a few options, including using more than one option--such as 2 Tramps use. A heat pump supplemented by a small wood stove would be ok with me--IF IF IF-- I can be sure the house will be cooled well in summer. I just imagine all the sunshine that will pour into those windows--which lovely as they are--would likely bake me to death.

Must have air. It does not cool down enough at night here in the summer to finagle your way to a coolish house by any means but a real air conditioner.

#3 Son arrives tonite from Wisconsin. I've missed him! I don't know if I'll see him though, The other kids are picking him up and they are headed to some friend's out of town for a couple days. They've earned their little weekend of R&R and Hubby and I will be on our own this weekend. We have a multitude of projects to choose from. Hubby wants me to help him dry wall ceilings so they can be insulated--I'm of a different mind. ;) We'll have to talk I guess. I think that is work best left to the kids when they return. They are stronger, have more stamina and are far more flexible than I am. We shall see..

No matter we'll be doing something I know that much, the project will continue to advance in one direction or several.

This project has been wonderful to keep us going and going on something as a family. I will be so proud of it someday when it is all finished and we've had time to landscape it and repaint in colors we like and all that. It will truly be our own home. Another thing that is never too far from my mind is the security in it. I know there is no 'real' solid rock of security in this world-- that being reserved for the world to come--but owning a home with no mortgage is as close you can get I think. It makes things that happen easier to bear--like huge ecomonic problems.

This week at work, Hubby found out that almost all the projects his group is working on have been put on hold. Recently the head of the building suddenly retired early and he will not be replaced. Raises were postponed and next years bonus--usually a little more than 1/4 of our yearly pay is very dubious now. Staying employed is in the back of everyone's minds. Never mind the December bonus... will we still have jobs then? It has been good to stop and think--well if worse comes to worst--we have the house. If we can get it ready to move into, we can make it on a pretty small amount. Life has been hard scrapping for us in the past at times and I expect it will be again some day.

Someone I love who struggles greatly with anxiety told me yesterday she would feel better if her life were just more stable.

It gave me something to think about. I thought--well I know how she feels, I do. I felt that way before we bought the house, we have moved so much the past several years and I just wanted to KNOW where I was going to be from one spring to the next. I didn't care where so much as I wanted the questions to be done with.

I realized I spent many months worrying over this myself, so I can see why she is doing it. But I also realized--it was an utter waste of time. It didn't fix it at all. Not only that but life is not stable by very definition. We cannot know from today til tomorrow that we will even be here! Yet we do have some things we lean on and think are reliable, people and places and jobs and such like-- its just --they really aren't reliable are they? We don't have anything that we can't lose.

Knowing that, I think--yup-- there's probably reason to feel anxious.

However, my faith in Christ tells me not to. Jesus said think of those little birds, like the Carolina Wrens I was writing of earlier. They don't worry about all that. And YOU are more valuable than many little birds. True enough. If we could all just remember that, to lean on Him instead of all our poor substitutes. Will Our Father not care for us? That's what faith must be.

MATTHEW 10:29-31
Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father.But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.

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